Br00tal-lists 0 The Ten Best Metal Albums for Keeping Away Trick-or-Treaters October 28th, 2021 at 12:39pm Axl Rosenberg Includes aural moats full of alligators by Carcass, Mayhem, The Dillinger Escape Plan, and more.
New Stuff 0 Surprise! Portal Released TWO New Albums Today May 28th, 2021 at 11:54am Axl Rosenberg Avow is typical heavier-than-heavy atonal death metal; Hagbulbia is the sound of a white noise given hellish form.
Shit That Comes Out Today 0 Sh*t That Comes Out Today: May 28, 2021 May 28th, 2021 at 8:56am Jeff Treppel Featuring Portal, Perturbator, Daniel Davies, Alastor, Ghastly, and more
Least-Sucky Songs of the Week 0 MetalSucks’ Least-Sucky Songs of the Week April 24th, 2021 at 9:00am MetalSucks Featuring Portal, The Bronx, and more.
New Stuff 0 Portal’s New Song “Eye” is a Protective Forcefield for Misanthropes April 22nd, 2021 at 2:14pm Axl Rosenberg Play this shit loudly enough and one is coming within a hundred feet of your door.
Cinemetal 0 What Movie(s) You Should Watch Tonight Based on Your Favorite Metal Band January 18th, 2019 at 3:44pm MetalSucks Movie recommendations based on Metallica, Slipknot, Slayer, Ghost, and more.
Apocalyptic Anniversaries 0 Notable Metal Albums Celebrating Big Anniversaries in 2019 January 2nd, 2019 at 10:00am MetalSucks Includes Korn, Slipknot, Pantera, Slayer, Megadeth, Cannibal Corpse, and many more.
Shit That Comes Out Today 0 Shit That Comes Out Today: January 26, 2018 January 26th, 2018 at 9:23am Phil Boozeman Your one-stop shop for all the week’s heaviest releases, including Machine Head, Tribulation, Portal, Howling Sycamore, Mammoth Grinder and many more.
Reviews 0 Portal’s Ion Is like Getting Punched by a Pinch-Harmonic Black Hole January 25th, 2018 at 12:43pm Maximus Pro-anti.
New Stuff 0 “Phreqs”: Portal Sell Out, Introduce Music into Their Music November 27th, 2017 at 9:23am Axl Rosenberg Great. What’s next, fucking “Enter Sandman”?!?!?
Upcoming Bullsh*t 0 ‘Most Extreme Band EVER’ Nominees Portal Tease New Album, Ion October 23rd, 2017 at 3:09pm Axl Rosenberg As in, “Ion-a hear it right now.”
Punishing Pictorials 0 Famous Metal Album Covers Recreated with Porgs October 11th, 2017 at 1:16pm MetalSucks The cute critters from Star Wars: The Last Jedi take over album covers by the Big Four and more.
Viral Vomit 0 Listen: Every Periphery Song Played at Once September 1st, 2015 at 4:30pm Axl Rosenberg Sounds like… Portal?
Metal Mysteries 0 What is Phil Anselmo’s “Secret Death Metal Project”? May 19th, 2015 at 10:30am Axl Rosenberg Get in here to read our wholly-plausible theories!!!
New Stuff 0 Antiversum: The Scariest Metal Band Since Portal? April 15th, 2015 at 3:00pm Axl Rosenberg Look at them! They’re not even people… THEY’RE JUST SHADOWS!!!
Music Dorkery 0 Breakdowns are SO 2004; I’m Into Fixups! April 1st, 2015 at 4:30pm Axl Rosenberg Will fixups ever replacebreakdowns as one of the most laughably overused aspects of metal?
Friday 5 0 Friday 5: Hipster-Proof Metal Bands October 10th, 2014 at 4:30pm MetalSucks We’ll never have to share these bands with the aloofly ironic
Cinemetal 0 If You Watch This Teaser for Portal’s Projection Show at Housecore Horror Fest, You Will Die in Seven Days September 12th, 2014 at 2:30pm Axl Rosenberg The Ring ain’t got nuthin’ on this shit.
...And F*ck You Too 0 Psycho Analysis: Diagnose Yourself Based on Your Favorite Band September 3rd, 2014 at 5:00pm Axl Rosenberg Like the DSM, only metal!
Greatest Hits 0 Heavy Metal Drinking Games July 17th, 2014 at 2:30pm MetalSucks Do not read this if your name is Matt Pike.
