Lolz 0 Dude Booted From Trump Rally for “Trump Likes Nickelback” Sign January 13th, 2016 at 10:00am Emperor Rhombus Muckraking has reached new heights.
Lolz 0 Whatever You Say, Joey December 8th, 2015 at 2:30pm Axl Rosenberg “It sucks just to think all those years went by […]
Lolz 0 An Excerpt from Charles Dickens’ Grim Expectations November 11th, 2015 at 5:00pm Emperor Rhombus “So I came to be called Pip, until I became known as Blasphemoth Christraper.”
Lolz 0 W.A.S.P.’s Blackie Lawless Does Not Understand How Hallucinogenics Work November 11th, 2015 at 12:30pm Emperor Rhombus “It’s impossible that any men could have written [the Bible] without divine inspiration.” My college sketchpads disagree.
Lolz 0 Writing and Recording of New Tool Album Delayed Again While Maynard Rearranges His Sock Drawer November 4th, 2015 at 4:30pm Axl Rosenberg Despite successfully reuniting this past weekend for a Halloween show, […]
Lolz 0 You Can See Mike Portnoy Play His Hello Kitty Drum Kit Live October 29th, 2015 at 10:30am Emperor Rhombus You CAN. Whether or not you should, we can’t say.
Lolz 0 Women Have No Place in Metal (Please Let Me Smell Your Hair) October 26th, 2015 at 3:00pm Emperor Rhombus Real men play on ten, weep privately, worry they’re not good enough.
Lolz 0 Breaking: Slayer Ate a Booger October 13th, 2015 at 12:00pm Emperor Rhombus Drop everything to read this mind-blowing piece of metal journalism.
Lolz 0 Adrian Smith Pulled A Full Hammett, Lost His Phone Full Of Ideas October 9th, 2015 at 1:30pm Emperor Rhombus Don’t worry, he got it back.
Lolz 0 One of These Things is Not Like the Others October 2nd, 2015 at 2:00pm Axl Rosenberg Notice anything strange about the admat for Bay Area Deathfest 2?
Lolz 0 If You Liked Seasoning The Obese, You’ll Love Repentrée September 23rd, 2015 at 2:00pm Emperor Rhombus Burps like hell… when the fullness comes!
Lolz 0 Wes Borland’s Home Renovation Will Be Featured On Television September 17th, 2015 at 12:30pm Emperor Rhombus “I want our kitchen to say, ‘Skull-faced monkey.'”
Lolz 0 Here Are James Hetfield and M. Shadows Pretending to Be Video Game Zombies August 26th, 2015 at 2:00pm Emperor Rhombus Where’s Daryl Dixon when you need him?
Lolz 0 Crust-Punk Porn is Independent, Cruelty Free, Makes You Feel Bad They Have A Dog August 26th, 2015 at 1:30pm Emperor Rhombus Disfacial.
Lolz 0 Take This Clickhole Quiz To See If You’re Truly A Metallica Megafan August 25th, 2015 at 12:00pm Emperor Rhombus Do you even know the lyrics to “Sour Attitude,” bro?
Lolz 0 Gene Simmons Does Not Care for Randy Blythe’s Vocals August 24th, 2015 at 2:30pm Emperor Rhombus He’s also perplexed by that damn rap music the kids like so much.
Lolz 0 Okilly Dokilly are the Ned Flanders Metal Band You Never Asked For August 13th, 2015 at 2:30pm Emperor Rhombus Thanks for coming out here and keeping the scene alive, neighborino!
Lolz 0 A Scene from William Shakespeare’s Metallica July 15th, 2015 at 1:30pm Emperor Rhombus Or, ‘The Tragedy of Prince Hammett.’
Lolz 0 Boston Metal Musician Arrested for Wearing Bullet Belt July 14th, 2015 at 2:30pm Emperor Rhombus The “spiked fighting gloves” didn’t help either.