CINEMETAL ROUND-UP: NEW VIDEOS FROM COLD, THE SORROW, SKINLAB, AND WHERE THE OCEAN MEETS THE SKY

I’m going to put approximately as much work into this introduction as Throwdown put into not sounding like Pantera.

First up today we have “Wicked World,” the new video from Cold. Because Cold is apparently still a thing. And now only is this song painfully boring, but the video has no logic to it whatsoever. For example, it starts out with a teenage girl wearing a Cold hoodie. Which makes no sense, unless the video takes place ten years ago. If the video is supposed to take place in the present day, then it should really be a divorced single mother of two who works at the Circle K in a Cold hoodie.

Next up is “Farewells,” from The Sorrow. I’ve actually enjoyed some of The Sorrow’s work in the past, but this song is really not good. Also, the video suffers from “If we block the shot with stuff that out of focus in the foreground, this will seem much more profound” syndrome. It’s still a million times better than the Cold video, though.

Next up is Skinlab’s clip for “Face of Aggression.” You really don’t even need to watch this one. If you have any Ambien around, you could just swallow a handful of those and let the effects take hold — it would be roughly the same experience as sitting through this video.

And we conclude today with Where the Ocean Meets the Sky’s video for “We Are But Instruments,” which debuted on Noisecreep. As the band’s name might suggest, they play metalcore with vocoder-heavy good cop/bad cop vocals while wearing coordinated outfits and doing choreographed stage moves. And the video is about someone being abducted and something bad happening to that person. In other words, this is the most original metal video ever by the most original metal band ever. Let us all look to WtOMtS as a bastion of creativity and inventiveness in extreme music.

In conclusion: no, seriously, have you seen that awesome new Red Fang video yet?

-AR