THE MOST METAL BURGERS ON THE PLANET

When I think of metal and food, I usually think of microwavable burritos, overpriced festival vendors, and terrible, life threatening, ass ripping diarrhea.

Luckily for all of us, that will now change.

See, I’ve never been to The Windy City, but now I have reason to go: Chicago restaurant Kuma’s Corner, which features burgers and sandwiches named after every band from Sabbath to Metallica to Slayer to Maiden to Pig Destroyer to Lair of the Minotaur to Mayhem to Mastodon, whose honorary burger, pictured left, comes topped in BBQ Sauce, cheddar cheese, bacon, and frizzled onions.

Fuck. Now I’m hungry.

-AR

[thanks: Thomas C. Willis]