Gwar’s Pustulus Maximus Talks 5G Tower / Coronavirus Conspiracy Theory

Earlier this week we checked in with Gwar guitarist Pustulus Maximus via video satellite feed from the band’s HQ in Antarctica to find out how they’re coping with the current coronavirus lockdown. Unsurprisingly, ol’ Pusty had a lot of um, interesting things to say about the whole situation, ranging from the content he’s been uploading to OnlyFans, Gwar’s immunity to COVID-19, the 5G tower conspiracy and more.

On whether Gwar, whose species hails from outer space, are immune to the coronavirus:

“I’m not a scientist or a doctor although I have practiced medicine [snorts], a lot of medicine, but I would think that we are probably immune.

“As many times as I have gotten over syphilis, I don’t even need to go back to the doctor anymore, my body boots it out in a matter of a couple hours. I’m immune to herpes I and II at this point, not III. We’ve dealt with HIV and AIDS; we figured out from cartoons that if you just inject a lot of cash into your veins that that’ll fix HIV.

“You have be to rich… But COVID-19, we’re probably fine, I don’t know.”

On how Pustulus is dealing with the social isolation measures in effect in much of the world:

“Isolation has been great, I haven’t had to see any of my bandmates, none of our enemies. I try to do that anyway but then they’re always calling you a jerk, and saying you’re selfish and stuff like that.

“But now, I’m totally being heroic. I love how the tables have turned in this situation. It’s great. I’m doing society a favor. So maybe when this is all done, ‘Ol Pusty can come back on top and people will put him on a pedestal and everything. 

“And when everything gets comfortable again…. BAM! I hit ‘em with COVID-20.”

Advice for those who are trying to stay safe from infection:

“Well… to keep themselves from getting infected, I’d be trying to promote it. Like the British Prime Minister said, herd immunity is going to fix it all.

“I would try to make lots of calls under the new 5G towers. That whole thing is retarded, I want whatever those guys are smoking. I mean for one, how many 5G towers are there in America, like three? You think they’re going to give us any of that stuff? You guys ever had a cell phone plan in Europe before? It’s way cheaper! It’s way better. Japan too. Except for Europe, their plumbing over there is atrocious. It’s a fucking mechanic’s hell.”

You can watch or listen to the entire chat below via either the YouTube or audio embed.

Thanks to Gretchen P. for the transcription!