SWEET CHYLDE O’MINE

Today I’m starting a new column, Readers’ Choice. As the title suggests, in this column I and the other writers of MetalSucks will, from time to time, discuss bands that you, our readers, suggested. Sometimes we will say happy things about these bands and sometimes we will say sad or angry things about these bands, and sometimes we might not say anything at all. It’s just going to be an attempt to throw a greater spotlight on you, the reader. Because we care what you think.

Sort of.

ANYWAY, the inaugural edition is going to focus on Chylde, a band recommended by bear wizard. I think bear wizard has been reading the site for sometime. Thanks for your support, bear wizard!

Now before we begin, let me make a prediction: someone will inevitably claim that Chylde are not a metal band. And I’d like to say to that someone: fuck you in the nostril.

Fuck you in both nostrils.

So. Chylde are a sludgy stoner-metal outfit from Buffalo, New York. Kind of amazingly, I don’t think I’ve ever been to Buffalo. But I did once know a girl from Buffalo. Her name was Dith (as in “Mere”). She was one of those people who had a very sunny outlook on life, pretty much no matter what. Like Vince! I don’t know what these people like Dith and Vince have in common, other than that they are probably going to outlive me.

I suspect the dudes in Chylde are a lot like Dith and Vince, too. ‘Cause, like I said, they are a stoner rock band. And, appropriately, their music totally rocks, but is also incredibly chill. It’s the mold, the fuzz, that’s growing on the guitar and bass tones. Like a buzzsaw with the edges dulled. Enough to make the zoom zoom, but not enough to actually hurt anyone.

‘Cause why would you wanna hurt anyone, duder? The music is so good.

-AR

Get right and then go listen to Chylde on MySpace.