Guy Who Owns a Bar Says Guns N’ Roses Reunion is a Go

This is silly, and I am writing about it precisely because it is silly. Fair warning.

According to Metal Insider, the owner of Melbourne’s Cherry Bar, one Mr. James Young, has given the following quote to Triple M Radio:

“I heard the most amazing rumor this week, from a very well informed heavy hitter in the Australian music industry, giving me the name of the headline act for Soundwave next year. Now we know that a mystery band has come in and saved the festival, and now owns it, so they they are going to have a big say. So what mega band could it be? Well I have heard ‘fantasized’ on Wednesday night that it will be: Steven Adler, Izzy Stradlin, Duff McKagen, Slash and Axl Rose, the reformation of the original 1987 Appetite for Destruction Guns N’ Roses lineup, can you believe it? It’s incredible, I’ve had sleepless nights fantasizing about it.”

Which is amazing, because my dentist just told me that he heard a rumor that Nirvana are gonna reunite at the next Lollapalooza with Jim Parsons on vocals.

Look: given that Cherry Bar books music acts in addition to helping people to get drunk, I suppose it’s possible that Young has some insider connection. But given how many crazy rumors there are about Guns N’ Roses every year, I dunno why anybody would care what anyone besides Axl Rose says. Even if The Ginger One and Slash are buds again, Rose still owns the brand, which means he’s still the boss.

Also, it’s really not nice to tease Steven Adler this way. The poor guy’s heart can only take so much.

If the reunion does actually happen, though, and does actually happen at Soundwave, I fear Kevin Lyman may fall into a deep depression. If Axl and Slash had just made up a few months earlier, there might still be a Mayhem Fest.