Heavy Montréal: 3 Weeks Til North America’s Best Fest

This might be weird: Nobody I know has attended the same metal festival more than once. The traveling ones like Ozzfest. The ones that happen yearly in the same city like Milwaukee Metal Fest (RIP). Any of them. None of us has been so dazzled by the experience that we’ve made it a point to return (though we’ve never made it a point to not return). That seems weird! Maybe it’s an America thing. Could it be that our metal events are so forgettable? Are we so short of time and energy? Does our transport system make it a chore? Are me and my buds boring?

But that’s about to change for the same reason that it came up in conversation (and shocked us) — because we’re stomping a path back to fabulous Heavy Montreal this August! See, last year it was a hoot (read part one, part two): Danzig won best in show, Rob Zombie’s visuals freaked me out, Steel Panther ripped; I encountered killer donuts, Dave Draiman’s weirdness, Phil Anselmo’s tenderness, a car in the financial district blasting Skid Row, sweet honies, nice buds, and Gwar for the final time. But the reason to return is beyond all that. It’s Montreal and its terrif Parc Jean-Drapeau, it’s the event’s sunny vibes and hassle-free plotting, it’s the setting and the staff. That’s why we’re dropping everything to get back — and then reporting all about the experience to you like you’re our brah who didn’t make the trip :)

Now for our brahs who are making the trip, there’s a lot of awesome bands to fill out the scenery: Newly re-christened Heavy Montreal, the two-day jam flaunts a superb line-up of all-time heavyweights (Overkill! Anthrax! Voivod!), reconfigured greats whose new (or new-old) line-ups we’ll see for the first time (Exodus! Slayer! Voivod!), fancy egghead bands (Cynic! Bad Religion! Voivod!), party starters (Municipal Waste! Nashville Pussy!), Vince Neilstein favorites (Babymetal! Whores.!), the righteously angry (Body Count! D.R.I.! Twisted Sister!), the just angry (Whitechapel! Lamb Of God!), the newsworthy (Unlocking The Truth), comic relief (Fucked Up, The Offspring playing Smash), and Metallica by request. See you there brahs!

Heavy Montréal is August 9-10 at lovely Parc Jean-Drapeau. Tickets here.