Austrian Death Machine Drummer Latest to Join the Tim Lambesis Mass Exodus
I’m not even gonna lie—I get such a dopamine release watching all of this unfold like it’s the newest franchise of Real Housewives. You must be a truly shitty person if, in addition to all of the members of your main band leaving your ass high and dry, it starts to seep into your secondary band as well. Austrian Death Machine drummer Brandon Short announced last week that he’s leaving the band to deal with some personal issues, largely due to his moral beliefs that in no way align with the existence of lead vocalist Tim Lambesis.
That fucking clown—Lambesis, not Short—has managed to clear out almost every metaphorical room he’s in like he’s the nastiest, stinkiest, spray fart to ever be farted out. With Short now being the latest part of the Lambesis/As I Lay Dying mass exodus, it seems like hope is deservingly and understandably being lost for his working career and collaborations with other musicians.
It just sucks so bad how one fucking asshole can fuck everything up for the rest of us. Short did not make this decision lightly, as you can tell in his departure statement…:
“!!DEPARTURE STATEMENT!!
“It is with a heavy heart that I announce my decision to step away from Austrian Death Machine. For the sake of my mental well-being and personal beliefs, and in light of the recent developments surrounding the As I Lay Dying camp and Tim, this has become an inevitable step for me. Although it feels necessary, it’s one I made after deep reflection as these events began to unravel.
“To walk away from something I cherished so deeply, that once felt like a fulfilled dream, is incredibly painful. I grew up listening to As I Lay Dying and Austrian Death Machine, never imagining that one day I’d be part of this world that meant so much to my younger self. But dreams can come at an unexpected cost, and that cost has proven to be too great. My integrity and character have been called into question in a way I can no longer accept, especially with what has come to light and being in utter disbelief.
“The repeated promises, the endless cycle of “I’ll do better”—words that once gave me hope—have turned into a broken record that has brought no real change. Instead, I found myself trapped in a pattern that eroded my trust and my well-being. This cycle has reached into my personal life, affecting my mental health in ways I can no longer ignore.
“I want to express my heartfelt gratitude to everyone who enjoyed my drumming on Austrian Death Machine’s latest album—it was a project I poured so much effort and pride into. To all who supported me and came out to the shows in Europe, thank you for being part of that incredible experience.
“Here’s to embracing new adventures and creating even more music that resonates. The best is yet to come!”
This shit is like that show Survivor but in reverse. All of mf’s are itching to get the fuck off Lambesis’s island, and it is undeniably entertaining.