Love Bites: Finding Common Ground and Loving Someone Different
What’s up, metalheads! It’s your girl, Cinnamon, with some more love advice for the month. I see all the Bitter Betties in the comments are mad that a “online working girl” is giving advice on love. Well let’s just say that if I had to guess, I’d assume I have a lot more experience in the love and sex department than them. Maybe if they spent more time reading our relationship column and less time being a whiny bitch, they wouldn’t be alone…
Anyway moving on from the naysayers, I’ve been collecting questions from people of all walks to life to get to the heart of their issues and draw from my own experience to hopefully give the best advice I can.
Now, it wouldn’t be the internet without a buncha people trying to get their rocks off in the replies, but if you have a serious question or need advice, email me at [email protected].
Now, let’s get started.
“What’s your opinion on dating someone who has different religious/spiritual beliefs than you?”
I had
another person make the question personal and ask me how am I able to date my current partner since I’m vegetarian and he’s a beef farmer. So what I am gathering is yall wanna know “how can you date someone that’s opposite of you?”
Okay, that’s simple: respect, maturity and tolerance.
When I was a lot younger, having control over a partner and wanting them to be like me might have been more important, but as I grow older and wiser, I realize I can coexist with those with opposing views (not including bigotry of course).
Will having different core beliefs be a possible clash for a couple? It can be — especially if you’re raising children — but I feel these are the conversations you have before making those major life decisions. If you’re really that hardened into your beliefs that you can’t bulge, then maybe dating someone of a different cloth isn’t for you to begin with.
But I personally am an open-minded person and I don’t need to control my partner. I believe it all boils down to respect and listening to your partner’s views without judgement or mockery. Dating someone with a different background can give you more perspective and round you out. I personally feel like it can be a fun experience if you allow it to be.
As far as my personal life, yes I am meat-free and my new boyfriend is a beef farmer, but I don’t oppose his choices. Being meat free is my personal journey based on my own ethics and I don’t put my own morals onto other people. I let him live his life and I live mine. He was born and raised on a farm and I am a city girl. He’s not going to view eating meat the same way I do, and I accept that. That is love.
Love is not control or dictatorship, it’s compromise and understanding.
I feel like a lot of people don’t actually want someone to love and care about, they just want property to own. This is why so many people are miserable. Why would you date someone just to change them, instead of accepting who and what they are?! I could just date a vegan instead of forcing my beef farmer boyfriend into a plant-based life! If you’re going to purposely date someone with a contrasting life, embrace the differences. Love them for it, learn from it. Grow from tolerance.