Black Metal Songs to Kill the Romance This Valentine’s Day
When it comes to setting the mood, we can affirm that Mayhem, Silencer, Abruptum, and the Beherit-related Goat Vulva (very important) are all great ways to creep out your date. And while that may not be your goal tomorrow if you like your partner, if you’re looking to either end things or take the relationship down a weird and dark path, the following bands are exactly what you should blast on the obnoxious holiday that is Valentine’s Day.
Contrary to what you might expect, there is actually a sense of romanticism — especially romantic longing and the romantic idealization of nature — woven into the fabric of many high-quality black metal releases. As a general rule, however, black metal should be war, not love.
Thus, if you like your black metal perverted, dangerous, hateful, and anti-human, then enjoy our list of black metal songs that are sure to convince your significant other that you’re a total psychopath. These songs may not be sweet, but they are sexy.
Gaahlskagg — “Skullfuck”
The surely sexy track “Skullfuck” first appeared on the 1999 split with Stormfront called Erotic Funeral Party I / Styggmyrs triumf. It then reappeared on Gaahlskagg’s first and only full-length album, Erotic Funeral (2000). It’s truly a shame that the drum and guitar recordings for Gaahlskagg’s second album were ruined. The project was ultimately shelved because Gaahl had other priorities.
Ragnarok — “Blackdoor Miracle”
The sadistic and murderous title track on Ragnarok’s Blackdoor Miracle (2004) is simply classic. Blackdoor Miracle’s cover happens to be one of the most polarizing in the genre, but it’s also one of my favorites. It depicts the “switchblade slut” from the song. We can clearly observe that the artist took the following line into account: “Now the flames are licking her.” As you can also see, the gun-wielding Jontho — Ragnarok’s drummer and co-founder — is one sexy beast.
Lifelover — “Nittlot”
“Nittlot” is the perfectly wretched ending to Lifelover’s groundbreaking masterpiece of a sophomore album, Erotik (2007). The Swedish lyrics are delightfully sick. This surprising song demonstrates that Livelover was truly in a category of their own. Within “Nittlot,” you will hear the famous “M/S Salmonella” from Livelover’s debut record, Pulver (2006), played backwards.
Shining — “Låt Oss Ta Allt Från Varandra”
This iconic track hails from the album V — Halmstad (Niklas angående Niklas), which is rightly regarded as one of the greatest black metal releases of all time. “Låt Oss Ta Allt Från Varandra” almost makes you want to commit a murder-suicide. Ultimately, it fails because it’s just so orgasmic that it turns you into a “Lifelover” instead. It’s a shame that Shining’s mastermind, Niklas Kvarforth, has captured so many hearts when his real aim is blood; sometimes plans backfire.
So Much for Nothing — “My Precious”
The brilliant band So Much for Nothing has only released a split with Angst Skvadron, the amazing project of the late Trondr Nefas, and an album called Livsgnist (2012). So Much for Nothing began as the solo project of Sarkom’s Erik Unsgaard, but Uruz of legendary bands like Vulture Lord soon joined him on drums in the studio. Some other great musicians have performed with SMFN live. We hope that the project will surprise us with more material one day. But for now, enjoy Livsgnist’s fifth track: “My precious… I will slit your throat.” This lovely gem follows the epic “Suffer in Silence,” which features Kvarforth.
Sarcoma Inc. — “Sadistic Ways of Domination”
Like Ragnarok, Sarcoma Inc. also has an album by the killer title Psychopathology. Whereas the Ragnarok record dropped in 2016, the Sarcoma Inc. title unleashed its fury in 2008. From the latter release, we just had to go with “Sadistic Ways of Domination” for today’s twisted purposes. The album’s next song, “I’ll Spit on Your Grave,” is yet another hellish anti-love song.
Carpathian Forest — “Black Shining Leather”
You might have guessed that this cold-hearted classic was coming! After all, it’s only the title track of Carpathian Forest’s 1998 debut album.
The 3rd Attempt — “Art of Domination”
“Art of Domination” can be found on The 3rd Attempt’s debut album, Born in Thorns (2015). The 3rd Attempt features Den Saakaldte and ex-Sarkom’s Tybalt, ex-Carpathian Forest’s Blood Pervertor, ex-Carpathian Forest and ex-Emperor’s Tchort, and ex-Midnattsvrede’s Ødemark. That’s one insane lineup.
Svarttjern — “Ultimatum, Necrophilia”
Where does one even begin with Svarttjern?! “Prince of Disgust”? “Shame is Just a Word”? Let’s go with “Ultimatum, Necrophilia” from Svarttjern’s 2014 album by the same name. Svarttjern was formed in 2003 by brothers HansFyrste and HaaN, who continue working together to this day. How cute! The band has confirmed that they take their name from a painting by artist August Cappelen. Black metal enthusiasts will know that Carpathian Forest also had a 1993 demo titled Journey Through the Cold Moors of Svarttjern. Three of Svarttjern’s current members actually play with Carpathian Forest, though they were all part of Svarttjern first.
122 Stab Wounds — “The Deity of Perversion”
“The Deity of Perversion” is final track on what sadly turned out to be 122 Stab Wounds’ only album. The Deity of Perversion was released in 1996 by Head Not Found, the now-defunct label that was founded by the Slayer Mag legend Metalion.
Gravdal — “Sadist”
Gravdal’s 2008 debut album Sadist features an interesting cast of musicians, including one current and one former member of Aeternus. Sadist is an obscure gem that you are going to want to revisit periodically. If you haven’t heard this record yet, let the title track serve as your intro.
Slaktare — “I Hate You”
Could a message get any clearer than this? “I Hate You” hails from the Bavarian band Slaktare’s lone EP, Love Is Always Painful (2010).
Urgehal — “Demonrape”
Again, R.I.P. Trondr Nefas. Urgehal reunited last year to play some shows in honor of the 10-year anniversary of Trondr’s passing. Their “Death March for Nefas” is still underway. If you ever forget what black metal should sound like, just play Ureghal’s “Demonrape,” which first premiered on a 2005 EP by the same name.
Vulture Lord — “Deathfuck”
Vulture Lord is another project that featured Trondr Nefas. “Deathfuck” first appeared on the 1998 demo Desire for the Dead, though it is also featured on the album Profane Prayer (2003) as well as many Vulture Lord compilations, including a 1999 release by the same name. Thankfully, Vulture Lord lives on today.
Latex — “Hammerfuck”
Latex’s roster boasted two Lord Belial members. Unfortunately, the EP Hammerfuck (2001) was the only release that this project completed before breaking up.
Ov Hell — “Ghosting”
Although “Post Modern Sadist” or “Devil’s Harlot” are both great picks from Ov Hell’s The Underworld Regime (2010), we thought we’d change things up with “Ghosting.” Not only does “Ghosting” have the perfect title, but it’s also an especially bleak track. Not to mention, the charming King ov Hell and Shagrath are sure to bring out your partner’s jealous side.
Gorgoroth — “Procreating Satan”
If your significant other suspects for a second that you might be parent material, this Gorgoroth song will serve as a rude correction.
Nattefrost — “Nekronaut (Cunt Cunt Gimme More)”
Darkthrone’s Fenriz loves Nattefrost’s solo work, and you should too! “Nekronaut (Cunt Cunt Gimme More)” is the first track on Nattefrost’s second album, Terrorist (Nekronaut Pt. I) (2005), which followed the equally miraculous Blood & Vomit (2004). In 2022, Nattefrost gave his first solo performance in 15 years and announced that he’s working on a new solo release.
Umoral — “Shut Up and Worship My Cunt”
As a woman, I’m so grateful for this wonderful glorification of the female body. “Shut Up and Worship My Cunt” is the second song from Der sola aldri skinner. This release features some of the most wildly inventive men in music. These artists been involved in more of our favorite projects than we can realistically name: Mayhem and Nidingr’s Teloch, ex-Tsjuder’s Anti-Christian, Fleurety’s Svein Egil “Zweizz” Hatlevik, and Filip Roshauw of the Spellemann / “Norwegian Grammy”-winning pop band The Switch. Unfortunately, Anti-Christian has since parted ways with Umoral, but you can still hear him with other incredible groups like Doedsvangr and Beaten to Death.
(Now for some very important news: Teloch recently dropped an awesome track called “Dawn Patrol” by his electronic project Bergeton, which you can find here. If you are actually shopping around for some non-BM ear candy this Valentine’s Day, Bergeton’s Miami Murder (2020) is guaranteed to help you impress your date by clearly demonstrating that you have exquisite taste in music.)
And a BM Pick That IS Perfect for Valentine’s Day in the Traditional Sense…
Ved Buens Ende — “Those Who Caress the Pale”
Ved Buens Ende is the Proust of black metal with a surrealist twist. Their material is characterized by a mournful romanticism. Their music is rather dark, but what lover could resist its wistful charm?! To date, VBE has only released the demo Those Who Caress the Pale (1994) and the record Written in Waters (1995), which happen to be two of the greatest BM releases of all time. Thankfully, co-founder Vicotnik has spoken about the possibility of a new album.
