GWAR Think Adele Might Be a Space Alien In Disguise

There has long been a conspiracy theory that there are aliens dwelling among us. Whether it’s David Icke’s bigotry-rooted belief that reptilian extraterrestrials have infiltrated the deepest corners of our political landscape, or the somewhat hilarious idea that the American government has aliens in tubes after they crash-landed in Roswell, New Mexico, the idea that beings from another world dominate ours is widespread and ridiculous. But as the old saying goes, it takes one to know one, which is why intergalactic sex warriors GWAR have decided to formally announce which human celebrities are actually aliens — and you’ll probably be unsurprised to discover who’s on the top of the list.

Speaking to Metal Hammer, GWAR front-creature Blothar the Berserker was asked about the band’s legacy and how they’ve seeded earth (literally, in great juicy globs). He then went on to explain that GWAR are most likely not the only alien creatures dwelling on this earth:

“I’m sure you want to know, who are the lizard people, the aliens in disguise? Well, Michael Jackson was one, but he’s gone now. I think Springsteen is suspicious. Adele doesn’t seem very human to me. Björk… you can’t tell me that she’s human! She’s hiding in plain sight!”

GWAR are about to hit the road in Europe, so catch them at one of their upcoming tour dates below. Meanwhile, if you want a lesson in safe sex, check out our video in which Blothar instructs you on how to put on a condom.

7/29: Tilburg, NL @ 013
7/31: Berlin, DE @ SO 26
8/2: Munich, DE @ Free and Easy Festival*
8/3: Essen, DE @ Turock
8/4: Wacken, DE @ Wacken*
8/5: Makowice, PL @ Pol’and’Rok Festival*
8/8: Dover, UK @ The Booking Hall
8/9: Brighton, UK @ Chalk
8/10: Bristol, UK @Fleece
8/12: Catton Park, UK @ Bloodstock Open Air*
8/13: Norwich, UK @ Waterfront
8/14: Leeds, UK @ Key Club
8/16: Glasgow, UK @ Garage
8/17: Manchester, UK @ Club Academy
8/18: London, UK @ The Dome