Beer Metal: Tankard, Stöner, and More of Your Drunkest Song Suggestions

MetalSucks Presents Beer Metal – Updated May 7th, 2022

I gotta be careful tonight, man. Tomorrow’s Mother’s Day, and now that I’m a dad, I can’t fuck around and disappoint both my wife AND my mom. That said, y’all should go nuts to these killer drinking tracks…

• Tankard, “Kings of Metal” – Bunch of you lushes don’t know how to scroll and kept claiming we had no Tankard on this list. This first one goes out to that venomous troll @iamnotgod45. Publish a photo or video of you skulling a beer or you’re just a bot.
• Stöner, “A Million Beers” – Super into this crunchy-ass album. I’ll take a shot.
• Hereza, “Death Metal Drunks” – This one’s a rager from Croatia, suggested by Kim B. Kim, house a High Life.
• Abigail, “Beer! Metal! Sex!” – The three food groups. This one comes from Frank Z. Frank, shotgun a Schlitz and crush the can on your head.
• Tankard, “Beermuda” – Even more Tankard. This one’s from Chris A. Chris, pound a stout and try not to yak.
• Nordheim, “Beer, Metal, Trolls and Vomit!” – What else do you need? This comes from Bjorn J. Bjorn, chug a Pilsner while doing a troll jig.
• Gehennah, “666 Drunks & Rock N’ Roll” – You can’t go wrong with Gehenna. This one’s mine, I’ll slug down a Porch Rocker as dessert.

That’s all for this week. Drink lots of unsweetened cranberry juice to keep them kidneys healthy, and  e-mail us at [email protected] with more drinking song suggestions.