Zakk Wylde Retaliated Against Ozzy Osbourne Farts by Hiding Sh*t in the Singer’s Couch
Ever wondered what it smells like when Ozzy Osbourne farts? If you answered “yes,” seek professional help. If you answered “no,” Zakk Wylde thinks you should be aware that the Ozzman’s gas is legendarily malodorous.
In a new interview with Metal Hammer, the Black Label Society frontman and longtime Ozzy guitarist reveals that during the recording of 1991’s No More Tears, Osbourne’s farts smelled so awful people concluded he must have a health issue:
“Ozzy had these stink bombs he just kept letting off… You could use them to clear fucking buildings, not rooms… Ozzy would be there at the back, ‘Sorry…’ and we’d be gagging, ‘Ozzy what the FUCK?!’ They were worried he wouldn’t be able to finish the record.”
The album’s co-producer, Duane Baron, seconds Ozzy’s claim:
“Honestly, at first we thought he had a real problem. He’d drop them everywhere – the studio, on flights, we even went to Las Vegas for a weekend and he dropped them in a casino! He would terrorize us with them.”
Okay. So. Ozzy’s farts are heinous. That’s not exactly surprising information — you wouldn’t expect a guy who has ingested enough drugs to kill any ten normal men not to have intestinal issues (and keep in mind this was thirty years ago, when Ozzy was in his 40s — Dio only knows how foul they smell now that he’s a septuagenarian).
What is surprising is the severe and next-level gross manner by which Wylde, Baron, and drummer Randy Castillo avenged their poor, abused sinuses. Explains Wylde:
“Every day Oz had this couch that he’d sit on to watch World War 2 videos or whatever, So I take my enormous shit in this bag and cut a tiny little hole, sliding it in until it’s properly hidden up the back of the couch.
“Meanwhile, Randy [Castillo] goes and takes a shit in some Tupperware, which he then stores in the fridge for later.”
Having successfully ensured that we will all now have nightmares about the late, great Castillo squatting over Tupperware, Wylde continues:
“Ozzy bellows down, ‘I was just trying to watch my World War 2 videos, thinking what is that horrendous stench?! I went to get something to eat, thinking we’d got some leftovers… they were fucking leftovers alright!’
“So fucking hilarious, man. There were shenanigans like that going on the whole time – it was a miracle anything got done! I can just see him pulling the shit from out the couch, thinking ‘How much do I pay these fucking scumbags to shit in my room – have I paid them to do this?!’”
So that’ll be fun to think about the next time you’re listening to “Mama, I’m Coming Home.”
Ozzy is currently working on a follow-up to last year’s Ordinary Man with that record’s producer, Andrew Watt. It will once again feature Chad Smith (Red Hot Chili Peppers) on drums, as well as drummer Taylor Hawkins (Foo Fighters) and bassist Robert Trujillo (Metallica). Longtime Ozzy collaborator and sideman Zakk Wylde will also participate in some capacity (he did not appear on Ordinary Man at all), as will Ozzy’s former Black Sabbath bandmate, Tony Iommi, iconic guitarist Jeff Beck and iconic guitarist/total dipshit Eric Clapton.
Ozzy also recently released a special thirtieth anniversary edition of No More Tears with a buncha bonus shit, like this version of “Hellraiser” featuring a duet with co-writer Lemmy Kilmister.
Black Label Society will release a new album, Doom Crew Inc., on November 26. Listen to the first single, “Set You Free,” here. They’re on tour right now; remaining dates are below.
Black Label Society, Obituary and Prong:
Oct. 13 – Lincoln, NE – Bourbon Theatre [tickets]
Oct. 15 – Bowler, WI – North Star Mohican Casino Resort [tickets]
Oct. 16 – Milwaukee, WI – The Rave / Eagles Club [tickets]
Oct. 17 – Chicago, IL – House of Blues Chicago [tickets]
Oct. 18 – Minneapolis, MN – The Fillmore Minneapolis [tickets]
Oct. 19 – Kansas City, MO – Uptown Theater [tickets]
Oct. 21 – Biloxi, MS – Hard Rock Hotel & Casino Biloxi [tickets]
Oct. 22 – Athens, GA – Georgia Theatre [tickets]
Oct. 23 – Dothan, AL – The Plant [tickets]
Oct. 24 – Lake Buena Vista, FL – House of Blues Orlando [tickets]
Oct. 26 – Ft. Lauderdale, FL – Revolution Live [tickets]
Oct. 28 – Huntsville, AL – Mars Music Hall [tickets]
Oct. 29 – Asheville, NC – The Orange Peel [tickets]
Oct. 30 – Cincinnati, OH – Bogart’s [tickets]
Oct. 31 – Nashville, TN – Marathon Music Works [tickets]
Nov. 02 – Philadelphia, PA – Franklin Music Hall [tickets]
Nov. 04 – Worcester, MA – Worcester Palladium [tickets]
Nov. 05 – Albany, NY – Empire Live [tickets]
Nov. 06 – Stroudsburg, PA – Sherman Theater [tickets]
Nov. 07 – New York, NY – Irving Plaza [tickets]
Nov. 09 – Hartford, CT – The Webster [tickets]
Nov. 10 – Montclair, NJ – The Wellmont Theater [tickets]
Nov. 11 – Rochester, NY – Main Street Armory [tickets]
Nov. 13 – Sault Ste. Marie, MI – Kewadin Casinos – Sault Ste. Marie [tickets]
Nov. 14 – Detroit, MI – The Fillmore Detroit [tickets]
Nov. 15 – Cleveland, OH – House of Blues Cleveland [tickets]
Nov. 16 – Fort Wayne, IN – Piere’s [tickets]
Nov. 18 – Oklahoma City, OK – Diamond Ballroom [tickets]
Nov. 19 – San Antonio, TX – The Aztec Theatre [tickets]
Nov. 20 – Grand Prairie, TX – The Texas Trust CU Theatre [tickets]
Nov. 21 – Houston, TX – Warehouse Live [tickets]
Nov. 23 – Tucson, AZ – The Rialto Theatre/Tucson, Arizona [tickets]
Nov. 24 – Las Vegas, NV – House of Blues Las Vegas [tickets]
Nov. 26 – Salt Lake City, UT – The Complex [tickets]
Nov. 27 – Denver, CO – Summit Denver [tickets]
Nov. 28 – Albuquerque, NM – Sunshine Theater [tickets]
Black Label Society, Armored Saint and Prong:
Dec. 27 – Reno, NV – Virginia Street Brewhouse [tickets]
Dec. 28 – San Francisco, CA – Regency Grand [tickets]
Dec. 29 – Los Angeles, CA – Wiltern [tickets]
Dec. 30 – San Diego, CA – House of Blues [tickets]
Dec. 31 – Tempe, AZ – The Marquee [tickets]
