Disturbed Announce New Album, Release New Song

Had we known that Disturbed would be releasing new music this morning, we would not have written up that short parody film The Sickness. Not because The Sickness is bad — on the contrary, it may single-handedly justify Disturbed’s very existence — just because two Disturbed stories in one day is two too many, especially so close together, especially ESPECIALLY so early in the morning. People have limits. The human spirit can only endure so much.

So we apologize. But, alas, here we are.

So: Disturbed’s new album will be called Evolution, and it will come out on October 19, just in time for Halloween, which is good news if you need music that says “Hey neighbors, if you let your kids come trick-or-treat here, I will give them a tribal tattoo and an Affliction shirt.” The first single off the album is called “Are You Ready,” and no, that’s not a typo — there’s no question mark in the title. It’s not presently clear if David Draiman isn’t familiar with that particular form of punctation or is just really into Harms Way or what.

In any case, I made myself watch the video and listen to the song and despite what Disturbed defenders have been telling us for years, I still think every one of this band’s songs sounds the same, plus or minus a guitar solo. But while the music may not be memorable, the video kinda is. Mostly because it has parkour in it, and a mere decade after that trend reached its saturation point and became ripe for parody.

You can pre-order Evolution here.