Cinderella v. Firehouse: Who is Better/Worse?

So we were hanging out with some friends the other day when it came to our attention that one of them is part of a heated, ongoing Facebook debate as to which glam metal band is better — Cinderella or Firehouse. Of course, merely mentioning this disagreement meant suddenly everyone in the group was now going to weigh in, and so soon that conversation became heated. And I was honestly kinda flabbergasted; I couldn’t believe my friends would even bother have to this argument.

I mean, CLEARLY Cinderella is the superior band by any metric. Duhhhhhh.

Let’s explore.

Music

This is a no brainer. I maintain that had Cinderella not dressed like Poison (or been called “Cinderella,” for that matter), they’d be a much better-respected band. Truth be told, their massive hit power ballad “Don’t Know What You Got (Till It’s Gone)” aside, Cinderella really didn’t sound much like other hair metal bands. Their best material, like “Shelter Me,” “”The More Things Change,” “Gypsy Road,” and “Hot N’ Bothered” sound like AC/DC made an album with material written by The Black Crowes. Which is weird, because Cinderella are from Philly originally, but whatever.

Firehouse, meanwhile, wrote the most generic cock rock imaginable. Frontman C.J. Snare even sounds like Vince Neil’s Mini-Me (if Vince Neil’s Mini-Me had a bad cold). I mean their music was fine, I guess, but it’s no one’s go-to for karaoke, know what I mean?

Sales

Firehouse are the very definition of a one-hit wonder: their self-titled debut, released in 1990, went double platinum, but their sophomore release, 1992’s Hold Your Fire (sheesh that is a terrible name), only went gold… in 2009, seventeen years after it was released.

Meanwhile, Cinderella made four albums, three of which went platinum at least once within a reasonable amount of time after their release (the last one, 1994’s Still Climbing, was released at the height of grunge, and the label basically dumped it into stores and forgot about it).

So, basically, Firehouse aren’t even in this fight.

Fashion

I mean if we’re being honest there are only losers in this category. Call it a draw.

Videos

Again, there’s no contest here. When Cinderella’s song “Hot and Bothered” appeared on the soundtrack for Wayne’s World, they actually got Mike Myers and Dana Carvey to appear in the song’s clip.

https://youtu.be/nw3pOWTh1Jw

As for Firehouse, well… urm…

Chili Dog Commercials

Cinderella appeared in this charming commercial for their hometown hot dog haunt, Pat’s Chili Dogs:

Firehouse have never appeared in so much as a chili commercial, let alone a chili dog commercial. So, once more, not much of a fight.

Agree? Disagree? Duke it out in the comments section below. Just remember, if you think Firehouse are the better band, you’re wrong.