Informal Reader Poll: What Song Topic Just Sucks?

I fucking hate when metal bands write about aliens. I don’t know why, exactly; I don’t love aliens in movies or books, but I certainly don’t actively despise them (I’m talking little grey men who built the pyramids, though–no shade on THE alien). But the minute a band puts some bug-eyed spaceman on their album cover, I automatically lose interest. Songs about visitors, clinical intelligences judging humanity with envious eyes, the possibility of life existing in deep space, it all puts me off. The only song I know of where I can stomach it is Darkane’s “Third,” and that’s only because their approach to the subject is very thoughtful and unusual, almost supernatural.

Every metalhead has a song topic that makes them roll their eyes. It’s usually one of the subjects that’s really common in metal lyrics–World War II, zombies, pirates, AI, vampires, superheroes–but sometimes you get those abstract concepts that make listeners groan. Someone once told me they can’t stand songs about overcoming adversity. Another hesher told me tracks about metal itself always piss them off. More often than not, people don’t know exactly why that subject matter gets to them, only that it does, to the point where they’ll skip a track if they figure out that the lyrics are about the thing they hate.

So you tell us: what subject matter sucks? What lyrical themes or references or characters annoy the shit out of you? Is there specific genre in which that topic runs rampant and you therefore loathe, or is it a broader theme that you find all throughout metal? Has a certain band disappointed you by suddenly writing an epic concept album about the one thing that you just can’t stand?

Let us know in the comments. I’m interested to hear everyone’s answer.