A New Study Shows Why Everyone Hates MetalSucks
Two days ago, we posted about a study published by University of Eastern Finland student Salli Anttonen, who researched exactly why everyone seems to hate Nickelback.
Shortly thereafter, we received a new study from one Reggie Caliente at North Bayonne University that examined why everyone hates MetalSucks.net!
Caliente amassed material some of our most visited and commented-upon posts, both on the site and on our social media, and used it to distill the reasons why a website’s own readers would consider it “just the worst, and mega-gay also.”
Reggie’s central thesis was especially enlightening:
“It’s Axl. It’s that fucking bastard Axl.”
His study went on to open up other mitigating factors surrounding the general distaste for MS found among its readers:
“The writers of the site appear to be a bunch of SJW PC fascists who use clickbait bullshit to start celebrity drama. Basically, it’s the TMZ of metal journalism.
“Sometimes, Rhombus writes good stuff, but when he tries to be funny it’s fucking pathetic. This isn’t some creative writing course at a liberal arts college, dick. Meanwhile, you have Brian Storm doing his whole whiny metal elitist thing thinking he’s just fucking hilarious, but he just comes off as a whiny poser bitch. They should all kill themselves.
“This, according to the majority of readers, is everything that’s wrong with the scene.
“Also, hey Vince, go Phillies.”
Though Reggie’s study is focused on the negative opinions of MetalSucks held by the readership at large, it did point out certain positive trends that can be found in the average reader’s opinion:
“At least Anso supports some real metal, sometimes. Sometimes. And that Whitney chick is easy on the eyes.”
While Caliente’s study is a little dry, it at least uses scientific reasoning to explain something we always only thought we knew. Finally, when someone says they hate MetalSucks, they have academic material that they can cite to back that opinion up.
Meanwhile, we invite all our readers to submit their personal findings to Caliente’s study here.
