Katatonia Announce New Album The Fall of Hearts Will Drop This May

Swedish progressive rock act Katatonia have announced that they will release The Fall Of Hearts on May 20 via Peaceville. This has triggered happy thoughts from any and all people who, possibly like a certain booze-themed metal blogger, might be a bit sleep deprived, dehydrated and worn out after a three day bender on this most terrible of Mondays. This will be the first album featuring new drummer Daniel “Mojjo” Moilanen and guitarist Roger Öjersson and it would be safe to say that we can expect another heaping dose of trancey/dreamy rock music.

Allow me to tell you why this news offends me. The Fall Of Hearts comes out on May 20, which is great and everything. However it’s difficult to ignore the fact that this album is scheduled to drop the day after my birthday instead of exactly on it. It’s just insensitive and I feel like the band didn’t even take MY feelings into consideration. Us May 19th babies still count. So what if that’s when half the Star Wars movies came out? They were the prequels! Our needs matter! WE ARE THE .0027 PERCENT!

But for real, mark the date on your calendars because The Fall Of Hearts is going to be great. And maybe mark the day before too so you don’t forget my birthday present.