Some Poor Bastard is Going to “Win” a Tattoo of Chris Fronzak’s Face

A couple of years ago Miss May I launched a search for the human being whom I assumed at the time would be The Stupidest Fan Ever: someone to get their logo as a tattoo (and they found that person, BTW).

But the Miss May I fan in question can now rest easy knowing that he’s only the second-stupidest fan ever. The newly-crowned Absolute Stupidest Fan Ever will be whomever enters, wins, and accepts the “prize” for this contest being held by Attila vocalist Chris Fronzak:

My tattoo artist @bprice1027 is going to be giving one of you a FREE portrait tattoo of myself! This is a $1,000 value that one of you guys is going to get for FREE! All you have to do to enter is place a @staysickthreads order and repost this photo! Tag me, @bprice1027, & #FronzTattooContest The BIGGER your Stay Sick order is, the more likely you are to win. I wanna know who my ride or die’s are! I will be personally picking the winner on February 10th! This is probably the coolest contest I’ve ever done, who wants a free tattoo?!?

A photo posted by Lord Zilla The SLiME MASTER (@fronzilla) on Jan 5, 2016 at 8:38am PST

There isn’t anything I can say about how completely fucking moronic this that would be as eloquent as what Lambgoat wrote:

“Let me boil this down for you: some singer wants you to purchase the merch he’s selling for a chance to win a tattoo of his face on your body. Read that sentence back a few times and then punch somebody in the face.”