Sunday To Get Blacker Than The Blackest Black

March 29th, 2015 at 4:20pm
Kip Wingerschmidt

This one ought to speak to you deep in the recesses of your cold black heart…

Hot on the heels of this month’s “controversial” debate over Portland band Black Pussy being forced to cancel a show in Raleigh, North Carolina because of serious threats of violence and vandalism to the venue and its staff over the band’s racy name, maybe it’s time we reexamine the gravitas of our darkest color. Or better yet, the power of female genitalia — simultaneous giver of life/palpable threat to our existence.

Nah, let’s just stick to Brother Vince’s favorite subject on Earth: bbbblllllaaaaacccckkkkkknnnnnessssss………

So would this harmless stoner pop band have caught this much slack — so much, for that matter, that there has been a ~~censorship~~ feminist petition circulating online calling for the group to change its name or face a boycott of all the venues that book the band — if it was called White Pussy? Or Paisley Pussy? Somehow I don’t remember Syracuse art-punk band Perfect Pussy receiving quite this much heat for using the same word in its band name, although the buzz generated definitely gave them a big push.

So what are we learning here? Well, clearly that feminism = racism and the blackest black has a strength unto itself. But we knew that already, right?

And here I thought black was back — why, it was only this past Fall that we were marveling at the black burger created by the culinary wizards at Burger King Japan, and being way-too-psyched about completely head-to-toe all-black Indonesian Ayam Cemani Chicken (including meat, bones, and organs!) — could it be that our beloved color black has taken a fall from its unholy status?

I for one am unfazed by the hoopla — just the other night I found myself championing racial equality by enjoying a Black Hog Nitro Coffee Milk Stout beer.

Did Adult Swim’s recent Black Jesus show catch flack as well? I wonder what namesake comedian Lewis Black would think about all this.

Lord knows there are WAY too many bands with the “Black _____” name syndrome, but frankly Black Pussy is the first moniker in a while that has really grabbed anyone’s attention. So what does this group sound like anyway? Meh — as expected, the music isn’t nearly as exciting as the band name.

Speaking of the dark side, have you guys seen British brain-bending techno-Twilight Zone-ish show Black Mirror? Wowzers, racist feminists should probably steer clear of that one.

There are obviously umpteen Black Something bands/albums/songs, so I’ll get us started with a few classics below and you can contribute your faves in the comments section…