Marilyn Manson is a Never Nude
Wanna play a game? I’m gonna reprint a passage from a new Rolling Stone profile on Marilyn Manson, and you see if you can ever get the image to stop haunting your nightmares for the rest of your days. Sounds fun, right? Okay, here we go!
“Let’s say [Manson] wants to make love on those sheets, to his girlfriend, photographer Lindsay Usich, who is as slender as a witch’s broom and has the hair of a raven. First, no lights shall be on. ‘I’m just really shy, despite what you’d imagine,’ he says. Second, no underwear shall be slipped farther down than his ankles. ‘I have a phobia that the house is going to catch fire, and I don’t want to be naked,’ he says. And finally, five is the absolute minimum number of times that the act of ‘sexual congress,’ as he calls it, shall take place in a day, with 10 being the most recent maximum.”
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!
When reached for comment, Ms. Usich had the following to say to MetalSucks:
“Yes, it’s totally true. I’m actually quite glad he refuses to leave the lights on. I’ve sown the pee hole in all of his underwear shut, too — so now if I can just get him to raise the maximum distance between the underwear and the ground from his ankles to his belly button, we’ll be in good shape!”
All kidding aside, I call bullshit on this entire claim.
For one thing, since when is Marilyn Manson “shy” about nudity? He once he put his balls on a security guard’s head mid-concert (and got sued for doing so)!
And leave the lights off? Are we to believe that Manson walks around looking like the ghost of Daryl Hannah’s character from Blade Runner if that character’s ghost had AIDS because he DOESN’T crave attention at all times???
And finally: “sexual congress”?!?! His use of this phrase doesn’t really add to my “he’s lying” assertion, but it does further prove my “he’s a douchebag” assertion. If I ever heard someone call fucking “sexual congress” without irony, I’d vomit right there on the spot. No way Rolling Stone‘s reporter heard Manson say that and didn’t at LEAST break out laughing immediately.
So anyway yeah fuck this idiot.
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