Sh*t That Comes Out Today: August 5, 2014

The purpose of your weekly Shit That Comes Out Today is twofold. First, it’s a helpful reminder of anticipated new albums. Thank us later. Second, it’s a browseable list of new stuff you ain’t never heard of! So, shed your hipster eyepieces, peruse this week’s collection of heretofore unpopular bands for a few new all-time faves. Diamonds in the rough, so they say, shine brighter than that shit you can buy at Jared. 

·

Darkest Hour
Darkest Hour (Sumerian)
On a playlist with: Unearth, Bleeding Through, It Dies Today
Listen Darkest Hour full stream (here)

I for one welcome our new melocore overlords. Hard-and-fast Darkest Hour fans might not appreciate the new de-tuned feels or the total Dimebag-ripoff solo from the first track. These are just little things though, because Darkest Hour is a decent live-up to the shiny self-titled album name. You can tell the band has actively re-tooled and reinvented themselves! I’m also glad there are a few tracks which throw back to this. That thrashy, modern groove works wonders, the sentimental bits work well. No complaints.

·

Belphegor
Conjuring The Dead (Nuclear Blast)
On a playlist with: Dark Funeral, Marduk, Enthroned
Listen “Gasmask Terror” (here) “Conjuring The Dead” (here)
Read Sammy O’Hagar’s Review for MetalSucks (here)

Please direct your attention to the “Conjuring The Dead” music video. It’s everything a cheesy metal video needs — it has blood, a chick drooling blood, somebody beating a puddle of blood with bones, a crucifix falling off a ledge, and a man with face paint. Campy, who the fuck really cares — just listen to that intro. Oh, it’s industrial, death-inflected, elephants-marching, blackened deliciousness. And now it’s on repeat!

·

Entombed A.D.
Back To The Front (Century Media)
On a playlist with: Dismember, Grave, Bolt Thrower
Listen “Vulture And The Traitor” (here) “Bedlam Attack” (here)

It feels like everyone is mishmashed about who the fuck Entombed A.D. actually is and what they should sound like. You shouldn’t care less. Back To The Front is a masterwork of crunch and grime. It’s not the most diverse release in its genre, but it regains miles of ground via sheer, booming weight. Those wolf-like howls + uppercut riffage + periodic drum rolls = dark nirvana. Also the dude is holding a hammer. Bitches love hammers.

·

Gnosis Of The Witch
Dauðr Burðr Þrysvar EP (Iron Bonehead)
On a playlist with: Serpents Lair
Listen Dauðr Burðr Þrysvar EP full stream (here)

Take a bit from the band’s promo materials: “Gnosis Of The Witch know neither time nor place, their invocations solely driven by the wisdom hidden within the abysmal nothingness of Ginnungagap, each of the four songs contained here a veritable spell of black magick seeking to tear asunder one’s earthly bonds and crawl deep within the yawning, abyssic void.” Right on, I guess!

·

Columns
Please Explode (Relapse)
On a playlist with: Glass Casket, Wretched, Vehemence
Listen Please Explode full stream (here)

The all-around polite dudes in Columns have courteously entered their new album into this week’s Most Enjoyable Listen Of The Fucking Week contest. And they’ve won, hand over anal fist. It feels like Please Explode was written to for one purpose: To actually melt whales with music. Proof: A dead whale on a beach totally fucking melted after listening to Please Explode. Explain that, science.

·

Trudger
Dormiveglia (Church Of Fuck / Sell Your Soul)
On a playlist with: Swinelord, Iced Out, Razoreater, early Mastodon
Listen “Thickening Fog” (here) Dormiveglia full stream (here)

Well fuck me in the ass! This masterpiece of an album was accidentally listed early on another Shit That Comes Out Today. But now I get to say a few words about it: Listen. To. This. Shit. Right. Now. In fact, listen to it so hard that you lose control over basic bodily functions. I know I have! Also, have this for a bit of an experiment: Compare it to Mastodon’s Remission. They go hand in bloody hand — thematically and instrumentally different but entirely complimentary. We’re fucking pairing wines up in here.

·

Mastodon
Remission reissue (Relapse)
On a playlist with: Trudger, Gojira, Baroness
Listen “Elephant Man” and a guy fondling this vinyl (here)

For me, Mastodon’s Remission is the semen of a huge sect of metal. It’s a seminal album; it’s birthed many alike and some divergent, all that can be traced back through its webbed lineage. Like a grandfather, it grinds with armchair mentalities and has more style than Ryan Gosling’s underwear drawer. It drinks bourbon and has more nooks and crannies than a decomposing face. Above all, though, it feels true and heavy, and what more did we want from metal?

·

OTHER SHIT THAT COMES OUT TODAY

Alestorm Sunset On The Golden Age (Napalm) listen read
Avulsed Carnivoracity reissue (Xtreem) listen
» Blues Pills Blues Pills (Nuclear Blast) listen listen
Bolzer Soma (Invictus) listen
¤ Brimstone Coven Brimstone Coven (Metal Blade) listen listen
Capture The Crown Reign Of Terror (Artery) listen
» Cardinal Wyrm Black Hole Gods listen
Cemetery Fog Towards The Gates EP (Iron Bonehead) listen
Chaos Moon Resurrection Extract (I, Voidhanger) listen
Cold World How The Gods Chill (Deathwish) listen
Eluveitie Origins (Nuclear Blast) listen
Four Letter Lie Like Structures (Artery) listen
Fractured Spine Memoirs Of A Shattered Mind (Inverse) listen
Godsmack 1000hp (Republic) listen
Holy Tongues Weak People (Melotov) listen
» John Gallow Violet Dreams (I, Voidhanger) listen
John Garcia John Garcia (Napalm) listen read
Kix Rock Your Face Off (Loud & Proud) listen
Lelahell Al Insane…The (Re)Birth of Abderrahmane (HPGD) listen
Mouth Of The South Struggle Well (Facedown) listen
Mutilated Veterans Necro Crust Warhead EP (Hells Headbangers) listen
Nachtmystium The World We Left Behind (Century Media) listen
Ommadon V (Dry Cough/Domestic Genocide) listen
» The Order Of The Solar Temple The Order Of The Solar Temple (I, Voidhanger) listen
Panopticon Roads To The North (Bindrune / Nordvis) listen
Paul Gilbert Stone Pushing Uphill Man (Shrapnel) listen
» Saturn Ascending (Live in Space) (Rise Above) listen
Skid Row Rise Of The Damnation Army — United World Rebellion: Part Two EP (Megaforce) listen
Star Insight Messera (Inverse) listen
Swashbuckle We Hate The Sea EP (Get This Right) listen
To Set Ablaze The Life We Lead (Autumn + Colour) listen listen
Vardan Enjoy Of Deep Sadness (Moribund) listen
Void Ritual Holodomor EP (Tridroid) listen
Wovenwar Wovenwar (Metal Blade) listen

·