Scariest Thing Ever of the Day: Richard Simmons in Corpse Paint

Of this writing, we have no idea why in the sweet mother of fuck Richard Simmons threw on corpse paint, starting walking around in public, and had someone film it all and put it on his Facebook page. It’s possible he realized that metalheads tend to be on the less-than-healthy side and is attempting to conquer a new market with a video called Sweatin’ to the Church Burnings. It’s also possible he was just trying to be silly and didn’t realize that he comes off as about a trillion times more frightening than any Norwegian musician ever has. Or, it’s possible he KNEW how scary he was being, and he knew that seeing this video would make metalheads run for the hills as fast as they could, thereby losing the weight they’d never lose via Sweatin’ to the Oldies. I kinda like to think it’s that last one.

ANYWAY, watch this if you wanna have nightmares.

[via The PRP]