Surprisingly, the New James LaBrie Song isn’t “Agony”

James LaBrie releasing a song called “Agony” oughta be a gift from the Metal Comedy Gods — I mean, the jokes practically write themselves.

But smack my ass and call me “Darla,” because the song is actually at all terrible. I mean, yeah, LaBrie’s voice is still pretty goddamn irritating. But former Soilwork guitarist Peter Wichers wrote some of the material on the album, and while I don’t know for sure, I’m guessing he wrote this track — it certainly sounds Soilwork-esque, especially when you consider the screamed vocals that off-set the shittiness of LaBrie’s vagina voice. I’m not sure who’s doing that screaming — keyboardist/co-songwriter Matt Guillory is credited with “background vocals,” but these are most certainly not just in the background — but whomever it is, I thank him for figuring out a way to ensure I don’t just wish I was listening to Liquid Tension Experiment instead.

“Agony” will appear on James The Cheese’s Impermanent Resonance, which comes out July 29 in Europe and August 6 in North America on InsideOut.