Let’s Gossip About How Much Money Famous Metal Vocalists Make

Remember back in August, when the website celebritynetworth.com compiled a list of rock’s richest drummers? Well, now they’ve done the same thing, only for vocalists. And I’ll say about this new list what I said about that old list — how much money these guys make is obviously no indicator of their actual talent… but it’s still fun as a source of gossip.

And thus, here are the singers relevant to the world of metal, from richest to poorest-on-this-list-but-still-richer-than-you’ll-ever-be:

• #1: Paul McCartney Net Worth – $800 Million (The Beatles) – I know he’s not metal, I just thought you’d be curious to know who took the top spot. This isn’t surprising at all.
• #6: Gene Simmons Net Worth – $300 Million (KISS) – In the words of the wise Yogurt: “Merchandising! Merchandising! Where the real money from the movie is made!”
• #11: Dave Grohl Net Worth – $225 Million (Foo Fighters, Nirvana on drums) – I’m really surprised to see him so far up on this list, but good for him! No wonder Courtney Love is so pissy about his finances — she doesn’t appear on this list.
• #17: James Hetfield Net Worth – $175 Million (Metallica) – Same amount of money as Lars Ulrich is worth, which makes sense. I want everyone who thinks I’m picking on Metallica to please keep this figure in mind from now on, please. I’m not saying the band didn’t earn it — I’m saying they can take a little flack from some dude on the internet.
• #19 : Axl Rose Net Worth – $150 Million (Guns N’ Roses) – I honestly would have guessed that his fortune would have been near-depleted after years of inactivity — especially given his known penchant for spending money as though it might lose all its value at any second. But he must be at least a semi-savvy businessperson, seeing as he personally didn’t lose a dime on Chinese Democracy. I’m sure being the sole owner of the name “Guns N’ Roses” doesn’t hurt, either. I’d be pretty curious to see where Slash or even Duff or Izzy stacked up here.
• #22: Steven Tyler Net Worth – $130 Million (Aerosmith) – To review: he’s been working his ass off consistently for forty years; Axl Rose basically dropped off the face of the earth for a decade and still has more money.
• #23: Jon Bon Jovi Net Worth – $125 Million (Bon Jovi) – No snarky comment.
• #24: Paul Stanley Net Worth – $125 Million (KISS) – So Gene’s various business endeavors have, in fact, made him the richest member of the band. I wonder if that ever comes up when they fight.
• #26: Sammy Hagar Net Worth – $120 Million (Van Halen) – Unsurprisingly more than David Lee Roth. That must make Sammy SO FUCKING HAPPY. Selling his tequila company undoubtedly helped.
• #27: Robert Plant Net Worth – $120 Million (Led Zeppelin) – No snarky comment.
• #28: Bruce Dickinson Net Worth – $115 Million (Iron Maiden) – Ozzy is two spots down, which must make Brucie smile when he thinks about how much shit Sharon gave Maiden on Ozzfest in 2006.
• #30: Brian Johnson Net Worth – $90 Million (AC/DC)  – No snarky comment.
• #31: Ozzy Osbourne Net Worth – $90 Million (Black Sabbath, Solo)  – And that’s WITH Sharon selling every last inch of him. Honestly woulda thought he’d be higher on the list… again, to think he’s below Axl Rose is a little baffling.
• #40: Joe Elliott Net Worth – $70 Million (Def Leppard)  – No snarky comment.
• #48: Chris Cornell Net Worth – $60 Million (Soundgarden, Audioslave)  – Wow, I didn’t see that coming.
• #53: Vince Neil Net Worth – $50 Million (Motley Crue)  – You mean he hasn’t drank every last drop yet? Still twenty mil less than Tommy Lee’s got, though, probably because Tommy Lee’s sex tape sold better.
• #54: Billy Corgan Net Worth – $50 Million (Smashing Pumpkins)  – See Chris Cornell. I know these dudes had some big paydays back in the 90s, but I really thought they’d be far lower on the list.
• #57: Maynard James Keenan Net Worth – $45 Million (Tool)  – No snarky comment.
• #58: Jonathan Davis Net Worth – $45 Million (Korn)  – There is no God. I don’t like Gene Simmons, but at least I understand why he became so successful. This is just baffling to me.
• #60: David Lee Roth Net Worth – $40 Million (Van Halen)  – And yet, he tried to purchase weed in Washington Square Park. What the fuck, dude?
• #62: Trent Reznor Net Worth – $40 Million (Nine Inch Nails)  – I gotta say, this makes it all the more baffling to me that he gave up on his record label experiment; he obviously doesn’t need the money, y’know?
• #63: Kid Rock Net Worth – $37 Million  – I bet he has more in the Caymans. Mitt Romney gave him the number for a good accountant.
• #67: Scott Stapp Net Worth – $30 Million (Creed)  – See Jonathan Davis.
• #68: Chad Kroeger Net Worth – $30 Million (Nickelback)  – See Scott Stapp.
• #70: Geddy Lee Net Worth – $28 Million (Rush)  – No snarky comment.
• #71: Marilyn Manson Net Worth -$25 Million  – See Billy Corgan.
• #72: Zack de la Rocha Net Worth – $50 Million (Rage Against the Machine)  – See Marilyn Manson.
• #73: Rob Halford Net Worth – $25 Million (Judas Priest)  – I wonder if the number would be higher if he’d never split from Judas Priest? Not that anyone ever should complain about having that much money.
• #74: Chester Bennington Net Worth – $25 Million (Linkin Park)  – See Chad Kroeger.
• #75 : Dave Mustaine Net Worth – $20 Million (Metallica, Megadeath)  – I heard Dave started crying when he saw himself listed as a member of Metallica.
• #77: Geoff Tate Net Worth: $17 Million (Queensrÿche)  – REALLY?!?! This might be the most shocking one on the list as far as I’m concerned. I had no idea that Queensrÿche were ever popular enough to pull in this kinda dough. Wow.
• #79: Tom Araya Net Worth – $14 Million (Slayer)  – When reached for comment, Tom said, “I may have less money than Dave Mustaine, but I don’t see a member of fucking Anthrax on here.” Interesting to note that Dave Lombardo wasn’t on the drummer list at all.
• #80: Jacoby Shaddix Net Worth – $12 Million (Papa Roach)  – See Chester Bennington.
• #81: Bret Michaels Net Worth – $12 Million (Poison)  – In conclusion, VH1 pays less than A&E.
• #82: Scott Weiland Net Worth – $10 Million (Stone Temple Pilots)  – Really, less than Geoff Tate? My mind is reeling, guys, for serious.
• #83: Phil Anselmo Net Worth – $8 Million (Pantera)  – No snarky comment.
• #84: Fred Durst Net Worth – $8 Million (Limp Bizkit)  – FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK 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[via Metal Injection]