SPEAKING OF GERIATRIC REUNION ACTS: VAN HALEN TOUR POSTPONEMENT EXPLAINED

Last week, Van Halen postponed thirty-one summer shows without explanation, leading to speculation — “confirmed” by at least one anonymous source — that the band’s members were, once again, at each other’s throats. And as much as I love to watch rich musicians make themselves miserable in the name of satisfying their egos, that theory really didn’t hold water to me — ’cause the band didn’t postpone thirteen shows prior to those thirty-ones now-to-be-missed gigs, and if they hated each other that much… well… you see what I’m saying.

Now they’ve released a video in which David Lee Roth basically dismisses the rumors of in-fighting and chalks the postponement up to simple exhaustion. Which seems plausible, since DLR and the Van Halen Brothers’ combined ages are something like a billion. Watch:

Of course, this video might have been that much more convincing if Diamond Dave appeared in it with Eddie Van Halen instead of, y’know, his dog. But while I do absolutely find it plausible that these fellas still hate one another, I really don’t think that that’s why the tour has been postponed. These guys have worked long and hard to get along just well enough to rake in millions of dollars. I don’t think they’re gonna blow it now.

Holy shit, was I just almost kinda optimistic? What the fuck is going on here?

-AR

[via Metal Insider]