HOORAAAAY IT’S VAN HALEN ON INTERSCOPE RECORDS CLAP CLAP

Hey check it out Van Halen news!!

• According to rumor, the band is divided into two camps: one exclusive to guys named Van Halen and the other populated by a sole Roth. And cooperation between the sides has been not awesome. Expected? Sure. Exaggerated? Prob. I only heard third-hand from the guys in Chickenfoot. You can set your watch to Sammy’s shit-talking I swear! Remember 1986?
• They have announced that the Grammy noms announcement press conference thingy will be the setting of a Van Halen performance, presumably of a new jam. If there is a more fitting venue for new music from gods like Van Halen, I don’t know of it. I do hope that charming Drake will be there. P.S. Release date please.
• The longtime Warner Bros act recently squashed an imminent deal with Columbia. Reports credit David Lee Roth with nixing the deal, alleging his preference is that VH signs with a closer-to-home label. So they just announced a new deal with Interscope (above), headed by Jimmy Iovine (above, in the hat) aka the mentor-type guy from last season’s American Idol. Huh I wonder if Diamond Dave wants Iovine to swipe him a certain somebody’s lucrative Idol gig? Wow, that’d be wild. Better watch your ass, Ryan Seacrest!

-ADF

Hipsters Out Of Metal! is the adventures of a smily ’80s metalhead all high in the srs internet world.