UNOFFICIAL PHOTO CAPTION CONTEST: WHY IS SEBASTIAN BACH SO SAD?

Sebastian Bach has announced a September 27 release date for his new album, Kicking & Screaming. The press release makes no mention of any collaborations with Jamey Jasta or John 5, which would have been the reasons to at least be curious about this record, especially after the awfulness that Bach’s last outing, Angel Down. So… oh well.

But the press release did include a link to the below promo photo, by Gabriel Goldberg, and it might be the most inadvertently hilarious promo photo ever for a professional musician of whom you’ve actually heard. I can’t believe that anyone, let alone what was probably a team of people, thought it was a good idea to release a photo where Baz looks like he’s just about to start weeping. Because nothing screams “ROCK!” like a depressed blonde man with too much make-up on.

Vince is away on vacation, so there won’t be any of his patented photo caption contests for awhile. But if anyone can come up with a caption for this that actually makes me laugh, I will send them a goody bag of assorted whatever-the-fuck we have lying around.

So have at it…

-AR