AT LEAST JANI LANE WON’T RUN OUT OF BOOZE MONEY ANYTIME SOON

In case you don’t know, ex-Warrant vocalist is a horrible, horrible lush — there have been stories going around for literally YEARS now about him stumbling off-stage mid-performance to make his way to the bar, because he literally can’t wait for the show to be over and/or someone to bring him a drink on stage to get inebriated, and one time I even heard about him vomiting in the crowd. And a couple of days ago, Metal Sludge reported that the dude was about to cancel all his solo tour dates due to his drinking problems, and now it looks like they called that one correctly. I mean, no official reason for the tour being called off, but his website administrator did say in a statement that “I do not wish to elaborate [on the reasons for the cancellation], but I do ask for your prayers and thoughts to be with Jani and his family at this time.” Might as well have just said “Jani’s too drunk too tour,” y’know?

Luckily, Jani won’t go dry just because he’s too fucked-up to do his job: Bring Back Glam alerted us to existence of the below television ad for Gain laundry detergent, which features the Warrant hit “Heaven.” Presumably licensing that tune cost a pretty penny. So if you were worried about Jani finally having to sober up, due to lack of funds if not any actual desire to stop being a total mess, well, fret not!

The commercial gets bonus points for using the word “gooder.” And for not being the most embarrassing T.V. ad with which Warrant has been associated.

-AR