UNSIGNED AND UNHOLY: THE DIRTY, FILTHY AND PUTRID BANDS EDITION

(this photo comes from Egality’s MySpace page. I have no idea what the significance of it is, although they really want to let you know they mean business.)

You like your metal raw and dirty. Sometimes you just wanna jump into a pile of mud and roll around in it with the ugliest human beings imaginable — possibly while being shat on by a pig — all the while with the loudest, noisiest metal you can find blasting away at top volume. This Unsigned and Unholy column is for you.

• Egality: This is some nasty, nasty, brutally NASTY shit! Like a slowed down Portal that isn’t afraid to lock into a groove, spazz out, or just absolutely crush with skull-splitting death metal noise. The vocalist makes me feel like I have to go take a shit… now.
• Razorhoof: Razorhood are what hard rock could’ve become if it hadn’t gone off the rails into butt-rock / red state radio oblivion. Dark, dirty, and raw, these guys have Drop-D riffs up the wazoo (at least in sole song “The World Needs More Dentists” posted on their Bandcamp page) but aren’t afraid to rough them up with raw production and a healthy heaping of dissonance. Fucking gnarly. Download the Razorhood / Boarhunter 12″ vinyl split here completely for free.
• Jvlith Krishvn: MS Maniac Dan Wolfson used to send us a non-stop barrage of emails with links to second-rate Sumeriancore bands, and now he’s sending us the noisiest shit imaginable… huh, whouldathunkit. Is little Dannyboy all growed up now? In any case, Jvlith Krishvn are incredibly heavy and incredibly noisy, a mid-paced version hardcore-leaning grindcore. Definitely worth checking out if you like your metal ugly.
• Haust: Another Dan Wolfson pick, the email about Haust came with the subject line “hop off Kvelertak’s dick.” No thanks, Dan, we like Kvelertak’s dick just fine. But Haust are pretty good too, if not all that similar to Kvelertak save for maybe some shared hardcore influences. Haust are decidedly more angry and less rawk than Kvelertak, but they’ve got that same kinda swing n’ swagger so I can see where Dan is coming from. Watch the insane video for “Anti-Reproductive” below, featuring some glory-hole action by the guy in the cover of Therapy?’s Troublegum (NSFW):