THOSE WORDS DON’T RHYME, DUMMY

King Lizard are a modern British band attempting to be an 80’s Hollywood band, and like almost all bands attempting to be 80’s Hollywood bands that a) did not make their debut in the 80’s and b) were not actually part of the Hollywood scene, they’re pretty terrible. I mean, guitarist Nitro Knox does a good enough job with the whole Jeff LaBar thing that I think he can reasonably expect to someday get a chance to audition for Guns N’ Roses, but Vince Neil’s love child with Alexi Laiho is a horrible, horrible singer and lyricist.

To wit, the chorus, in which he attempts to rhyme the words/phrases “viva,” “decadence,” and “want ya.” I mean, there’s gotta be like seven million phrases which would have fit into the song all while appropriately conveying the band’s faux sleazy image, but no, this idiot has to go and get stuck on the phrase “Viva La Decadence” and try to make that shit work.

This is the title track for an album coming out March 28 in the UK, “later on in France,” and, mercifully, apparently no time soon in the U.S. The cover has some boobies with a snake crawling in-between ’em just for good measure, so if you’re thirteen and horny, definitely Google image search that shit.

-AR