BEST METAL SONG ABOUT METAL EVER OF THE DAY

When it comes to writing metal songs about metal, no one beats the Germans (with one exception: Manowar). It’s like there’s a giant bubble floating above Germany, one that only covers metalheads and prevents them from taking influence from any outside factors. When Axl and my grandchildren are throwing the horns together in the playpen 60 years from now, Germany will still be churning out hordes of cheesy power metal bands that constantly name-check themselves and sing about how great metal is.

Meet Kissin’ Dynamite, the terribly named (or greatly named?) newcomers to the German cheese scene. They’re addicted to metal (and steel!), just like you and me, and they want us to know it. They’ve even tapped their fellow German friend and cheese progenitor Udo Dirkschneider for an assist with their message. The minute I popped this tune on — from their new album of the same name — it was an instant classic in the Neilstein library and had to be shared with the masses. You can closely guess what the rest of the album sounds like… there’s even a power cover of Damn Yankees’ “High Enough”! Pure gold.

-VN