WALL OF DOUCHE

I only vaguely remember Yellowcard, which is to say I remember that there was a terrible band called “Yellowcard,” but I don’t remember their music/hit song/whatever. I was about to look it up on YouTube, but then I decided to just slam my nuts in the door and call it even.

ANYWAY, I mention them now ’cause the MetalSucks Maniac known as “MetalRod” sent us a link to the below video of Yellowcard trying to get a wall of death going. I say “trying” because even though they do get everyone to run around and stuff, the crowd doesn’t part more than about two feet away from one another before the charge begins. So they probably ran into each other with the force of cotton falling on other cotton.

Even funnier, though, is the Yellowcard dudes’ instructions to the crowd. I’ve never seen such a timid demand for a wall of death (and they never use the phrase “wall of death,” I guess because it might scare their fans). And, needless to say, this music in no way, shape, or form calls for a wall of death, or moshing of any kind. In fact, I’d say the only band whose music is moshable even though they have a violinist is Hung. In fact, let’s just go ahead and make that rule, okay?

-AR