I CAN’T PLAY THE STUPID NEW IRON MAIDEN VIDEO GAME

Boy, I love Iron Maiden, but I gotta say, it’s like they’ve been going out of their way to piss me off lately.

It’s one thing to do a tie-in with a real video game, but a lame online video game has got to be one of the biggest wastes of promotional dollars imaginable*, and maybe doubly so for Maiden: their fan base is either young enough to know the difference between a shitty game and a good one, or old enough to be completely confused by the entire concept of a video game.

And yet Maiden have launched an online game, and, being a dutiful metal blogger (and it being the news doldrums of August), I decided to give the game a shot. One problem, though — I can’t get past this screen:

I’ve tried on three separate browsers to no avail; at this point, I feel reasonably certain that it’s not a problem with my computer, although fuck do I know.

If anyone can get this bitch to load, let us know in the comments section whether or not it’s as weak as I assume it is.

-AR

*Remember the one for Mastodon’s Blood Mountain? If you didn’t, I’m sorry to have reminded you.