NERGAL FREE TO DEFACE BIBLES AGAIN!

I know I’m a cynical bastard, but can you blame me? People do idiotic shit on a second-by-second basis. Society is like a living embodiment of Murphy’s Law.

But, hey, every once in awhile, people prove me wrong, and we get some good news. Like the fact that Behemoth’s Nergal isn’t going to spend two years in a Polish prison for tearing up a Bible on-stage (video above). From a post on Behemoth’s MySpace page:

“The District Court for Gdynia has dismissed the investigation against Adam Darski (pseudonym/nickname Nergal) accused of an offence against religious feelings (sec. 196 of polish Criminal Code). During the preparatory proceedings the defender filled the application, which was entirely accepted by the Court. The defendant’s behaviour wasn’t recognised as a crime. Moreover the Court acknowledged no causal connection/cause-and-effect relationship between Adam Darski’s behaviour and the consequence in a form of outrage of religious emotions.”

Obviously this is terrific news, because now Nergal has plenty of material for the next Behemoth record, but we don’t have to be deprived of Behemoth. Also, because it means that assholes like me will have one less Polish joke to make (“Didja hear the one about the Polish courts…?”).

The post says nothing about a similar case which has been brought against Nergal’s fiancée, super-hot Polish pop star Doda, but since all she did was go on television and say she found it easier to believe in dinosaurs than the contents of the Bible (as opposed to actually destroying a Bible), presumably her case will be dismissed soon, too. And then she and Nergal can have hot, blasphemous sex. Or, if for some reason she goes to prison, Nergal can release an album full of mournful love songs. That might be interesting, too.

-AR