ANAAL NATHRAKH’S MICK KENNEY MUST HAVE SELF-ESTEEM ISSUES

Have you ever seen some smokin’ hot chick with a dude who’s not only like one-tenth as good looking as she is, but isn’t particularly smart or funny or interesting or even rich? And you sit there and you go, “What the crap happened there?” That’s usually around the time a friend leans over and whispers “She used to be fat, before they met.” And you go “Ooooohhhhh.” Self-esteem issues: she used to be a behema, and even with all the weight she’s lost, she has no idea how fine she is now. As a friend likes to say, “We all had a shot.” Just shows to go ya that it pays to be an arrogant fart nugget who hits on anything with a hole and a pulse, ’cause sometimes it’s a former fatty who has totally devalued herself.

I don’t really know much about Mick Kenney from Anaal Nathrakh, but I guess he used to have a weight problem, because he’s started a new band, Sorrows, with Bleeding Through’s Brandan Schieppati. When you think of all the people in the world Kenney could have collaborated with… why choose the dude from a not especially good metalcore band? Somewhere the guys from Bury Your Dead are thinking “Shit! We all had a shot.”

Sadder still is that Sorrows just aren’t very interesting. Anaal Nathrakh are one of those bands that challenge our perception of what metal could be, in the best possible way; if you didn’t know that Kenney was involved in Sorrows, you’d probably never even give them the courtesy of sitting through an entire song before shutting it off and going about your day. But if you’re curious, you can listen to some of their stuff here.

And because this is kinda-sorta a Bleeding Through post, I’ve included the customary photo of Marta after the jump. Be forewarned, however, that the MetalSucks Mansion Monkeys made a time machine and snapped this pic in 2020, after BT have broken up and she’s settled into life as a mommy and homemaker. So she doesn’t look quite as hot as we’re all accustomed to:

-AR