FORMER UNIMPORTANT BAND MEMBER THREATENS TO KILL CURRENT UNIMPORTANT BAND MEMBER

It’s 2009… even if you find yourself in the unfortunate position of being a DJ in a rock/metal band long after it was considered cool (if it ever even was), you’ve pretty much been relegated to the role of the kid who was always picked last in schoolyard kickball games. They’ll try and find a role for you out of pity, but really no one gives a fuck. So here we are 10 years after Incubus’ sound has featured a DJ in any prominent way, and former DJ Gavin Koppell (aka DJ Lyfe) is threatening to kill current DJ Chris Kilmore.

Koppell was ousted in 1998 after the S.C.I.E.N.C.E. record, well before the band’s 2000 breakout Make Yourself (and by the way fuck you if you don’t think the latter is a great album). In court papers filed last week in L.A. County Superior Court, Kilmore says Koppel threatened to kill him last month over an incident that took place back in 2003. Kilmore secured a restraining order against Koppell in 2003 after the latter spit in his face. Court papers claim Koppell has been ordered to stay at least 100 yards from Kilmore and his girlfriend. Read the nitty gritty details and case history at Noisecreep.

This is like a fight between the dude who was picked last in kickball and the dude was picked second to last. It’s a battle not to be the worst. Incubus’ sound hasn’t utilized a DJ in years… whenever I hear new music from Incubus I wonder why they even keep the guy in the band, kind of like the way Lacuna Coil keeps Andrea Ferro around because… why? Also, new Incubus sucks; they pulled a Chili Peppers and went all Adult Contemporary in their [not even that]-old age.

-VN