THE DREADFUL DEMO FILES: THE DECEMBER 2009 EDITION, PART II
[A series of absolutely dreadful demos to grace the doorstep of the MS Mansion of late has inspired me to resurrect The Dreadful Demo Files, in which we take a look at some of the face-palm-inducingly bad packages we receive. For the sake of these poor bands’ egos we’ve disguised their identities. I’ll be highlighting 3 bands this week (view Part I here)… the last of which is so absolutely righteous I’m not sure it can ever possibly be topped. -.Ed.]
This one had “suck” written all over it right from the generic logo at the top. But it didn’t end there. I’ve added in the little red numbers above to make it easier to refer to specific parts of this dreadful letter. OK, let’s go!
- OK, that’s good… we’re off to a good start! First of two pieces of info in this whole letter that are actually useful.
- This is by far my favorite part of this letter. “The band developed their sound and started making more brutal songs.” CLASSIC! What did they sound like before they started making more brutal songs? Why include this at all? Why not just skip to 2008? For that matter, why this specific timeline format? Why not just explain it all in a paragraph? The mind boggles.
- Adam… you don’t say… THE infamous Adam??? No way!!! Good thing they got THIS guy into the fold.
- They won a battle of the bands. Great.
- Tan joined the band… phew! I was nervous for a minute there that Adam couldn’t hold it down on his own.
- Why in the fucking fuck would I care?
- The second useful piece of information. A new demo! OK, but… what does it sound like? Why do you think we’d like your band?
- I care what the dudes’ names are… why?
That’s it for this edition. Wait until you see what I have in store for ya’ll on Friday… it is seriously going to blow your mind. I promise.
-VN
