THE TOP 6 MOST BRUTAL MACHINE GUN RIFFS EVARRR! (OR OF THE PAST 5 YEARS, AS IT WERE)

What exactly constitutes a “machine gun riff”? Rapid chugging? ‘Cause a couple of these just sound like breakdowns to me. Whatever it is, Jeffrey Nordin not only claims to know but claims to have the definitive list of the top 6 such riffs EVARRR. Explains Nordin via email: “Unlike the other myriad attempts at YouTube humor, this one is dry and witty and has one other gross advantage: It is factually accurate, because this is not just some random opinion, but my opinion which is demonstrably factual.” Well, let’s see about that.

Not a bad list! But oh hey dude, while I agree with your inclusion of “Remembrance” here, the band’s name is pronounced Go-JEE-rah, not Go-JIE-ra. Rhymes with pEnis, not vagIna. And as for your #1 most brutal machine gun riff of all time… so fucking br00tal dude! Great pick.

And I’m all the smarter for having watched this video: I now know what an “autodidact” is.

-VN