DEAR METAL BANDS: STOP IRONICALLY COVERING POP SONGS

MetalSucks Maniac Matt Clark sent us the link to the below video of the unsigned band YEAH! Destroyer covering Katy Perry’s “Hot N’ Cold.” And while I’m fairly certain Matt meant for us to see this cover as a good thing, I have to say – it fucking sucks. And I’m sick of bands doing this kind of shit.

It’s not like I’m offended that someone would butcher the classic work of Katy Perry or something – Katy Perry sucks. Based on the two songs of hers I’ve actually heard, she can’t sing worth a shit without the help of auto-tune, and therefore finds herself part of a pop legacy that teaches aspiring singers they don’t need any actual skill or talent so long as they look appropriately photogenic.

No, mostly, I just don’t think there’s any point to these covers; they don’t sound good and they’re not at all funny. Metal bands have proven in the past that there is a place for sincere covers of pop tunes in their catalogs. Just as an example, there Type O Negative’s “Summer Breeze” and In Flames doing Genesis’ “Land of Confusion,” and there’s Disturbed doing the same song a few years later and pretending that In Flames hadn’t just done it (Yes, I know there’s a million other examples – I’m not making a fucking list here because it’s beside the point). As far as I can tell, these covers were not meant to be cute or mocking; the bands seemed to legitimately enjoy these songs, and were expressing some desire to put their own spin on the material.

YEAH! Destroyer just belong to the same cretinous class as I Set My Friends on Fire and their version of “Soulja Boy,” which somehow managed to be both devastatingly unfunny and even more irritating than the original. Note to bands: if you think that covering a song people wouldn’t expect you to cover is going to be hilarious, you’re just fucking wrong.

-AR