ASKING GENE SIMMONS NOT TO BE AN ASSHOLE IS LIKE ASKING A DOG TO WALK ON ITS HIND LEGS

Which is why I would never engage in a debate with Gene Simmons about anything. It’s the same reason I rarely respond to comments left on this site. If I post about a band I think is great and someone’s response is “Ur a faggit,” what the fuck am I supposed to say that? My IQ could drop just trying to communicate with that person, so I don’t.

But music biz guru Bob Lefsetz must love  a Sisyphean task when he encounters one, because he’s been feuding with Simmons for the past week. The whole tiff started when Lefsetz criticized Simmons in his  newsletter (of which both Vince and myself are avid readers) for a speech Simmons gave during Canadian Music Week about various ways in which the music industry might stay afloat; Simmons responded with his own e-mail, in which he made fun of Lefsetz’s name. Seriously. This is the level of of maturity and intelligence with which Lefsetz is trying to engage.

The feud culminated in a public debate last week, which you can watch below – or don’t. Simmons’ opening argument rests not on any proof of acquired business acumen (and beside the admittedly phenomenal success of Kiss, it’s worth noting that 9 out of 10 Gene Simmons ventures fail – see exhibit A, Detroit Rock City), but, rather, on a bald joke. Which tells you pretty much everything you need to know.

After the jump, you can watch a clip of Lisa Lampanelli roasting Simmons on A&E last year. Which is considerably more entertaining than the video above.

-AR