HEAVY METAL FANTASY BASEBALL

The folks over at the LimeWire blog [via Idolator] have come up with a pretty brilliant way to kill time during a rain-delay; while they somewhat predictably call it “indie rock baseball,” we would like to co-opt this fine game for the heavy metal world (What athletes actually listen to indie rock? Psssh. Just ask Mike Piazza or any of the Metal Mets.). Basically the game consists of deciding how “clutch” an album is judging by the strength of its songs. Here are the rules:

• You start with two outs and no one on base.
• Each time you skip to the next track without finishing the one you were listening to, that’s a strike.
• Each time you finish a song, that’s a ball.
• Each time you actually *like* a song, that’s a hit. Naturally. Or a single, if you prefer. This also resets the count (as would four balls). Now you would have a runner on. Another hit (or walk) would advance the runner, etc.
• There are multi-base hits for songs you really like. It does help open things up, but please use sparingly, as we don’t want these things to end up being just another bunch of lopsided Yankee-Devil Ray games.
• A runner scores from 2^nd on a hit. I guess this would also imply a runner on 1^st would score on a double. Use your best judgment.
• Once a record reaches three strikes, it’s OUT. Of your CD player (or preferred music player).
• Otherwise, you post the result (e.g. 1 run, 2 left on base).

Pretty fucking brilliant. I could easily see this as being a deciding factor for which Ozzy albums are clutch, or a barometer on whether or not Metallica’s Black Album is in fact a winner.

-VN