WELL, AT LEAST OZZY HAS FIGURED OUT A WAY TO MAKE MONEY OFF OF OZZFEST

This afternoon, I got an e-mail from Epic Record’s official Ozzy Osbourne mailing list. Now, I have no fucking idea how I got on that list- maybe ’cause I’m on the Ozzfest mailing list, or maybe I signed up in the seventh grade, when I still had faith in Ozzy’s ability to put out a new record I’d actually care about.

ANYWAY, the e-mail informed me that Ozzy’s new album, Black Rain, is coming out May 22, and that the first trillion or so pressings would include a code to go online and get my free Ozzfest tickets before anyone else (except every other fucking person who buys the album with the code). Presumably, this is an attempt to raise Ozzy’s record sales, and therefore make up for the fact that he won’t be making any cash off of ticket sales for Ozzfest this year.

But I have a hard time believing this will do much of anything. As always, the kids who want Ozzy’s album will get Ozzy’s album, and everyone else will just download it illegally or find some way to go on living without ever having heard it.

Of course, I suppose it could actually be good…

-AR