THEY CAN REBUILD ME; THEY HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY

This one is sincerely dedicated to my recently crippled bretheren from Wednesday’s BTBAM show who’s currently in surgery for a broken angle. Best of cheers to you, mate – here’s hoping you sleep soundly through the painful parts…

It’s official – I am an iron man. Well, partially at least. The 3 pins you see above currently reside in my goddamn arm, and they’ll remain a part of me for at least a couple more weeks. It’s uncomfortable as fuck, and I keep pestering my doctor in a paranoid, whiskey-fueled flurry of freaked-out phone calls, but I suppose nobody’s ever died from a broken shoulder and I should probably just shut the fuck up for now and wait patiently until they dig into my flesh once again and pull ’em out.

Some of you have read about my recent brush with the NYC pavement, and my impending surgery that eventually seemed like it wasn’t necessary, but guess what, dudes? It was, and I ended up spending one seriously harrowing day in l’hospital. Thank god for valium in a needle, and whatever else they gave me to catch ZZZs whilst they chopped a hole in my arm and stuck a few metal pins inside my bone to stabilize that bitch on up.

So now I’m fast on the road to finally becoming Robocop, and as painful as this experience has been, I guess if I never break another bone again I can metal up and stomach the rest of the healing process like a grown-up bionic man. What other choice do I have? The whole thing makes me hesitant to do those crazy self-destructive things anymore (like get back in the pit), but I gots some time to think about it from the sidelines.

In le meantime, check out this playlist of steel:

BLACK SABBATH – “Iron Man”, from Paranoid (1971)

HELMET – “Ironhead”, from Meantime (1992)

MASTODON – “Iron Tusk” from Leviathan (2004)

THE SWORD – “Iron Swan”, from Age of Winters (2006)

AT ALL COST – “The Irony”, from It’s Time to Decide (2005)

BETWEEN THE BURIED AND ME – “Roboturner”, from Alaska (2005)

JERRY GOLDSMITH – “Robocop Main Theme”, from Robocop Soundtrack (1987)

“Murphy…it’s me…”

-KW