Ted Nugent: Officially a Liar

So hey remember when Ted Nugent told a National Rifle Association convention that “if Barack Obama becomes the president in November again, I will either be dead or in jail by this time next year”?

Well, guess when that was?

It’s not majorly shocking that The Nuge didn’t make good on his word, given that he shat his pants to avoid going to Vietnam.

But still, I’ve given this some though and decided we should all just pretend as though Ted Nugent did, indeed, pass away. Here, I even wrote an obituary for him:

“Mediocre guitarist Theodore Anthony “Ted” Nugent passed away in his home last night. He was sixty-four years old. The rocker, primarily known for the song ‘Cat Scratch Fever’ and for being a scientific anomaly whose testicles could not be viewed even under the world’s most powerful microscopes, died from embarrassment, doctors said. He is survived by his girlfriend, Starla, age nine. A memorial service will take place this Saturday morning, after which Mr. Nugent’s remains will be fed to zoo animals.”

See? And now we never have to discuss this ass wipe again!

Major props to Rimmy for both reminding us of this anniversary and sending us the awesome graphic of Mr. Nugent and President Obama.