CINEMETAL TRIFECTA OF DISAPPOINTMENT: NEW VIDEOS FROM OZZY, DEATH ANGEL, AND TIMES OF GRACE

I am in a seriously cranky fucking mood this morning, but I’m sure a new Ozzy video should cheer me right the fuck up. ‘Cause that shit always hit the spot, right?

Oh, wait. I must have been thinking of someone else, ’cause this video chugs monkey cum and asks for more. Actually, I guess it’s totally fitting for the song its attempting to sell: generic, boring, and sure to appeal only to the medically brain dead.

Next up is Death Angel’s new video, for the song “River of Rapture.” Like Ozzy’s new video, the nicest thing you can say about this clip is that the sound is perfectly in sync with the images. But unlike Ozzy, Death Angel still have their dignity, and unlike Ozzy, this music doesn’t make me wanna beat myself to death with a shovel. So, Death Angel have that going for them.

We conclude with Times of Grace’s clip for “The Forgotten One.” And, seriously, the band should be embarrassed. I mean, between this and that video they released of the ground, it’s pretty clear that no one involved in the creation of these clips gives even one-eighth of a fuck. And that being the case, they should use the time and resources to do something vastly more productive, like help feed starving children, find a cure for cancer, or kill themselves. I mean, really, guys, if you don’t care, why the hell should we?

Meanwhile, Times of Grace have also announced their touring line-up: it’s two dudes I’ve never heard of and Killswitch Engage’s Joel Pretzel, or Joel Strudel, or whatever his name is. In other words, 3/5ths of the KSE line-up that made Alive or Just Breathing. Do with that information what you will.

-AR