THE “W.A.L.L.S.” BETWEEN THE TONY DANZA TAPDANCE EXTRAVAGANZA ALL MUST FALL

Yep. I made a Living Colour reference in my TTDTDE headline. ‘Cause that’s the kinda guy I am.

Listening to Danza III: The Series of Unfortunate Events is like willfully submitting to letting a tank roll over you. It is OPPRESSIVELY and CRUSHINGLY fucking heavy. In fact, “crushing,” although obviously a metal-writer cliché, is the word that most often comes to mind when I think of this record. But it is crushing. It will also make your balls rattle, if you have balls. If you don’t have balls, allow me to describe that sensation for you: it’s tingly.

“W.A.L.L.S.”, which is now streaming at Stereo Killer, is your latest taste of Danza Trois, and it’s a good taste – it’s actually one of my favorite songs on the album, and exemplifies everything I like about it. They should have just called the song “P.U.M.M.E.L.Y.O.U.P.U.S.S.I.E.S.” Maybe that would have taken up too much space on the album sleeve.

So give “W.A.L.L.S.” a listen, but make sure somebody you trust is nearby when you do. I don’t want you to hurt yourself.

Danza III is out July 6 on Black Market Activities.

-AR